Security Guards and Barnes and Noble

So, I'm here at Barnes and Noble, using the internet. And smelling delicious (yet unobtainable) tasty Starbucks smells and surrounded by books. Mmmm. Best place ever.

However, I'm sitting by the door in the "Web Lounge" or whatever you want to call it, and I'm pretty sure there's a SECURITY GUARD standing by me. Um. At least, I assume he's a secruity guard. Because he's all dressed in a full on suit and tie and spiffy shoes, and he's just standing there by the door, observing everyone. He even has spiffy gold cuff links, and I'm pretty sure there's a gold pin on his lapel, but I can't be sure because I'm sitting on the opposite side of him. Can I just say that I'm terribly intimidated? He seems nice, but really, all security guards intimidate me. Isn't that their jobs? He seems really bored, kind of rocking back and forth on his feet.

OH! Wait! He just directed a kid to the bathroom, and now he's wandering a bit. Checking things out. Liike a security guard.

OH! I just saw his jacket! Okay, so it was a gold tie pin, and on the breast of his jacket was a patch/detail thing that said "M--- (something Security."

So that's it. He officially is a security guard.

Okay, so I feel safer now. Isn't that what security guards are supposed to do? But I also feel like... should I have reason to NOT feel safe? This is Barnes and Noble! All things are safe at Barnes and Noble! This is the home of millions of fairy tales and dreams and... goodness. Barnes and Noble= GOODNESS. It holds the esscense of my soul.

So why do they need a security guard?

I think I should make friends with him. I think I would like him. But I don't think he's supposed to fraternize with the possible threats like me (Am I possible threat? I sure hope not). Or, you know, dorks like me, because I am a happily self-proclaimed dork. And I'm just alright with that :D

Barnes and Noble really is, truly, my happy place. There is nothing but joy here. I absolutely love the smell of new books. If I could bottle that scent, of new ink and freshly cracked spine and the excitement of dingind a new story... I'd spray it on my pillow and let it soak into my dreams every single night. I'd bathe in it. I'd spray it on random strangers as they walked by.

If I could, I'd live here. It's perfect: Noto nly do I have all the books to last me a lifetime, there's a security guard to keep me safe, the Starbucks for delicious pastries and such and the best hot chocolate in the world for substance, internet access, and hello, they have the best bathrooms ever. Or at least that's what I've heard. I don't think I've ever actually seen a B&N bathroom. Aimmee, one of my old roommates once told me that everytime she goes into a Barnes and Noble, she has to go check out their bathrooms. Which I think it a totally cute quirk to have. One of my cousins once said that if she could get locked in any store overnight, it's be a Barnes and Noble. Smart kid.