My Body is Weird: Bruises

My body is weird. We know that. Today we are going to explore the weird way it bruises, or, more specifically, the way it doesn't.

I don't know why it doesn't bruise. Maybe because of the more than adequate fat layer surrounding, well, all of it?

But the weird thing is, while it won't bruise for incredibly violent injuries, it WILL bruise for the dumbest, lightest things ever.

Run into the corner of a table in the dark? No bruise. Pinch arm skin in a buckle? No bruise. Smash and crush fingers in a door? No discoloration whatsoever. Any other violent injury that I just can't think of at the moment? You better believe there wont be bruising.

Oh, in fact, when I broke my foot in the sixth grade? The doctor didn't believe that it was broken because it never bruised. "We'll take an x-Ray just in case," she appeased, "but I'm sure it's not broken." I was so triumphant when it was. WHAT NOW, DOCTOR LADY?!

Anyway...

But if I pull a bandaid off my arm?

Bruise. What the heck?

I get these random bruises sometimes, usually on my legs, and I have no idea where they come from. I have absolutely no memory of any injury whatsoever. I just don't understand. 

My body is so whack. Wiggidy-whack. Not the regular type.

So, yes, it's another thing that makes me not-normal. I may be the only person who can drop a brick on heir foot and know for certain that it WON'T bruise.

I'm fond of my weird body quirks. Kinda like I'm fond of my car's, Big Red, quirks. If I was presented with a new car that could actually turn and had reliable air conditioning and had a gas tank that could hold more than 10 gallons, I wouldn't turn it down. But I would miss Big Red and it's mysterious ticking noise and it's backfire tooting noise and it's massive windshield crack that got progressively bigger week by week. We had some good times together, and I'd miss the things that made it special. But only so much.