4.28.2011

Hiccups of DOOM

Man, I had the worst hiccups today. Which is saying a lot: those who have spent lots of time around me know that when I get the hiccups, I get the hiccups.

Loud. Painful. Ginormaus.

Frequent.

So, after a morning out at the doctors and random errands, I spent some time, minding my own business, lying on my bed reading The Age of Innocence, when I suddenly get the urge to clean my room. Now, I've been waiting for this desire for the last week (my room has had a great need to be cleaned, but I have to wait for that moment of sudden inspiration to finally modivate me, or else it simply won't get done), so I quickly marked my book and lept out of bed. It wasn't twenty seconds later when I was washing my hands that the first one hit. Then the second, third, and fifteenth, in rapid succession.

They went on FOREVER. Changing my laundry. Hiccups. Changing my sheets. Hiccups. Hanging up laundry. Hiccups. Over an hour and a half. That has to be some sort of record. They were coming like, every five-ten seconds. That's a buttload of hiccups, man.

On a scale of a annoyance, this episode of hiccups was beyond-freaking-ridiculous. I was half certain I was dying, drowning in broad daylight with clean laundry finally hanging in my closet, by poor lungs fighting for breath in large, dramatic gulps of air in painful bursts...

And can I just say? Hiccuping and sneezing at the same time = worst experience ever. Just saying.

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